Outspoken Nothingness

Saturday, December 27, 2008

George W. Bush Resume

Just when I thought this man can't possibly do worse than what I do know, I come across this.
The extent of his failures never cease to surprise me =)

Check it out:

Saturday, June 21, 2008

"Have you ever been hurt and the place tries to heal a bit and you just pull the scar off of it over and over again"

*It hurts to be hurt

*I'm not ready to grow-up. Not just yet. I haven't done half the things a "pre-adult" should do. What are they? I have no idea, but I don't feel ready. I actually feel ripped off my youth

*I turned into one of them...someone who talks just to fill the silence without saying anything worth saying The problem is: Because there's nothing to talk about, and I don't have much going on in my life, I fill the silence with bitching and complaining and nagging and whining. I HATE myself for that

*Why do I say yes when I always want to say no?

*Why am I always there for a friend who always needs me there when she's not not being there for me when in fact I need the space and she knows it?

*"She only got that for you because I got something for her last month when I went to Dubai. So she didn't want to give me something without also giving you something" (Regarding a "souqa"). This was said to be by a close friend when I described the girl as thoughtful for getting me a little something. Was that a little bit hurtful or am I being a bit too sensitive?

*All I want to do is live on a deserted island for a week or two with no human contact whatsoever, but given there is electricity and proper bathroom facilities. I just need some peace and quiet. Is that so much to ask for?

*I've gained 5 kilos in the past month. I feel too heavy for comfort.

*Even though nothing is going on in my life, where the only action I get is having dinner with friends, I feel very chaotic. Like I need to calm down. It's really taking a toll on me, and I have no idea how to control it.

*I want to do absolutely nothing and be absolutely useless, at the same time I want to be productive. It's driving me insane.

* I feel very empty....

* I want to feel better, and yet I feel there's nothing wrong. But then again, nothing is feeling good.

I am a mess!

Tuesday, May 27, 2008

It's That Time of Year...

It's that time of the year when all our projects are due....

My major requires us to apply EVERYTHING we learned all year, sometimes incorporating prerequisite subjects, on real companies/systems. So all year we go to that company to collect all the data we require. At the end of the semester, now, we put everything together and try to make sense of it. It's this time of the year thats MOST hectic. The seemingly never-ending problems makes group members want to rip each other's hairs out. Data are either not validated with the real system, or it's inaccurate, or missing. We get stuck mid-project with what seems like gibberish. And the worst kind of problem, the one we faced the past four days, modeling and simulating the system. There's no making up information, there's so skipping some parts... there's absolutely no way of disguising the fact that something just wasn't right. Everything is shown visually and statistically. As much as I hate it... as much as it stresses me our beyond belief... as much as it makes me hate my colleagues... as much as it makes me tired from spending 12 hours at uni. for a whole week, trying and trying... there's something about me that absolutely loves it!! I can't really touch on what I LOVE about it... but at the end of it.. it always makes me feel good. Not the typical, I understand, like the subject got an A feel good. It's different genuine kind of feel good.

My project is due in 11 hours, all the analyzing/written part still needs to be done, and here I am blogging, although I really do, and although I'm supposed to be very stressed because I have another couple of projects to work alongside finals all in a week, there's this goody feeling inside of me....seeeeee.... a genuine type of feel good. Ga9ib =P

Yes, Ma 3indi salfa all along =)